Casino diapers spell rash move for gamblers

At long last, a Canadian company is said to be manufacturing diapers designed especially for land-based casino gamblers. You know, the kind of gambler who is

a) so into their game that they either do not have time for such trivial matters like relieving oneself in private and leaving their behind’s work behind, or

b) so full of their own excrement to begin with that they’ve convinced themselves that more uninterrupted time spent at the slots will improve their chances of winning. Yeah, right.

The 6-layer cotton and micro-fiber diapers are said to be capable of holding 9 cups of ‘liquid’ (nice word for it). The diapers – which I like to call Texas Hold ’ems – can also be reused repeatedly, plus dry within one hour. And for you seriously ill gamblers, get this: you’ll be happy to know the diapers include Velcro closures and are available in white or burgundy, in case you’re planning on wearing them to the casino over your regular clothes.

Some gambling experts are already worried that the diapers will only lead to more problem gambling. But if you ask me, anyone even considering wearing these diapers for a second has been ‘holding in’ more than just gambling problems for a long and probably excruciating time.

When I contacted the diaper’s manufacturer to find out whether or not gamblers at online casinos could also benefit from the diapers, the company’s sales manager abruptly hung up on me. I can only assume she had more important ‘business’ to tend to.

The new diapers are available in various sizes including small, medium and diarrhea.

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